scromp: I only watch romantic comedies and documentaries about the sea.

<scromp> there's too many men, too many people makin' too many problems
<scromp> and not enough nug to go round
<archon-> if you're having nug problems i feel bad for you, son
<Xach> i got so many problems and nug is among the foremost of them

<martel> my milk is frozen again
<martel> fix it for me
<martel> you're the TD of making stuff go, right?
<scromp> if your milk is freezing it means your titties are getting much too cold.
<scromp> you might want to look into a warmer bra
<scromp> also, you might be a witch
<ton>    hahaha

<martel> its when i see the temperature is 99degrees and notice the trees
are perfectly still that I imagine them screaming
<nug> hah
<rippy> there is unrest in the forest, there is trouble with the trees
<scromp> the oaks have formed a union and walmart broke their knees

<Xach> too god damn hot to work :(
<scromp> more like too god damn lazy
<scromp> ben franklin didn't have air conditioning but he didn't whine
about the heat when he was inventing freedom

cooper: I'm like a clock, Kim. A clock that poops.

scromp: What do you think about getting a farm truck? We can park it out back.
chime: Sure. We've got plenty of space in the driveway
scromp: No, I mean park it out in the yard behind the shed.
chime: No. NO! You are not parking a truck in the yard!
scromp: what?! I'll put it up on blocks!

Note: do not let scromp label your moving boxes.

<mover guy> Um... ma'am. Where do you want this box? It says "Clown costumes and faire getup."
<chime> Yeah... those are actually my clothes. Master bedroom, please. 

<scromp> I like tequila... just not every day.

<scromp> you know the saying
<scromp> tequila then chianti... good idea.